Unstuck

9.1.2022

Thirty-four years, give or take. Full-time. Part-time brings it closer to forty. Eight thirty to five thirty with an hour for lunch, or something like it. Two weeks off a year and a week sick. An additional week a year granted in the last four years of the “career”. It was a living, as they say.

I already can’t remember what it was all about. I traded time for money. Did what they wanted. Even at the time I don’t think I really understood why anyone would pay all that money for it. I guess money has its own needs.

So now I renegotiate my relationship with time. Remove the company watch. Melt the clock’s face and throw a wrench in the great machine. Maybe I can discover a new pace, a new rhythm, a cadence for my hours and days not dictated by money but by curiosity and passion. Synch my heartbeat with the sun and the moon. Guide my actions by the ebb and flow of the tides and seasons. Maybe I will come unstuck like Billy Pilgrim in Schlachthof Fünf. Would that be bad? Is timelessness a simulacrum of madness?     

If I live as long as my mother, I have another thirteen years. If I make it to the government’s estimated lifespan for a man of my generation, I have about eighteen years to go. If I end up living as long as the oldest known member of my family, I can look forward to a whopping thirty-five years of retirement! There are a number of epidemiological factors that incline me to think it more likely that my time will tend toward the earlier termination date.

Time, as they say, will tell.  

Crustier and Crusteür

The new Lightning Bolt has arrived!

Some of you will know that I recently purchased a new Crust Lightning Bolt Canti frame. The main reason I bought it was the glowing review in Bicycle Quarterly. They basically said the bike nearly equaled the performance of the bespoke, custom bikes they ride, at a fraction of the cost. Having spent the past few years happily riding a Cycles Toussaint Vélo Routier, a budget variant on the same theme, i.e., a low trail, 650b rando bike, I was intrigued. I went on about my hopes for the bike in the previous post, and will provide details about the eventual build and impressions of the bike in future posts, but today I thought I'd assemble a list of links to other people's conversations around both Crust, the company, and the Lightning Bolt. Most of these resources refer to models prior to the 2022 version, but I think they're still relevant, or at least interesting to me. So, without further ado...

Path Less Pedaled
https://youtu.be/nEDra8YR8-s?t=261
"It's basically Bicycle Quarterly. Shake Bicycle Quarterly, this fell out of the pages." Matt  https://youtu.be/q5eJzXVzKFg
https://youtu.be/vYneDSM9JTY

The Radavist
https://theradavist.com/2019/09/ultra-romances-crust-lightning-bolt-is-lighter-than-a-soft-whisper/
https://theradavist.com/2020/03/nams-crust-bikes-cantibolt-lightning-bolt-thrower/
https://theradavist.com/2021/05/readers-rides-tins-crust-bikes-canti-lightning-bolt-in-central-florida/

Blue Lug Crust Videos (Japanese - turn on CC for enjoyably awkward subtitles)
https://youtu.be/LHuGZOdRArs
https://youtu.be/upoTnEgiFaY
https://youtu.be/-Wcca6XwTX0 

How Centaur/Mermaids say, "I love you"

Crustaceous sky fire

There's an entire hemisphere of my brain that can't believe I bought a Crust Cantilever Lightning Bolt. It's the side that drew me to graphic design with an emphasis on the written word. The hemisphere that makes me a font-weeny that pours over The Elements of Typographic Style, and have opinions about the differences between Helvetica and Arial. Christ, I obsess over typefaces even when writing utterly unimportant documents. Note for the Amazon guy to leave a package on the porch? Definitely Garamond. So how on earth did I end up with a bike whose model name is rendered in some kind of faux graffiti-esque face?

Crust Lightning Bolt Canti

And don't even get me started on the brand's pink Rocky Horror Picture Show typeface, book-ended by literal lightning bolt clip art and South Beach pastel colored banding. Dear Kröd.

Crust brand name in pink "grunge" typeface

Is it supposed to be some kind of skate punk thing? Homage to BMX? Don't get me wrong. I've been known to defend even the much despised Comic Sans typeface. Horrid in most places, but perfectly appropriate in a comic strip. Likewise the Lightning Bolt's type/iconography. It would sort of make sense on a skateboard or some of the brand's other models - the bikes that look like you'd naturally see them popping above the coping of an empty swimming pool. The Scapegoat maybe? Dude. Brah. Radical.

But on this bike? The Lightning Bolt's frame is a modeled on Jan Heine's classic French Réne Herse Randonneuse. Not exactly the heritage you'd expect from this typographic styling. All I can imagine is that the Crust guys came up with the name Lightning Bolt because they expected this lightweight to be fast, and the rest just followed from that. What a shame. But look, a bike designer gets to choose whatever graphics they want on their bike. I get it. If this is an expression of Crust's sensibility, why should they care what I think? Buy the bike or don't, pops. 

So given all that, what was I thinking? How could I bring myself to plunk down so much cash for a bike that irritates me every time I look at it? Well, it's precisely because it seems to be such a GREAT copy of that 1952 Réne Herse that I could not resist. Matt is obviously seriously into bikes. You'd have to be to think it's a good idea to get into such a crazy industry. And as a dedicated non-competitive, Path Less Pedaled, "Supple Life" type disciple of Bicycle Quarterly, he built a super-light, thin-walled, low trail, 650b Rando bike. But he did it his way. And his way, if the packing tape on the box in which the Lightning Bolt was shipped is any indication, is a bit zany. Tropic punk? Psychedelic metal? Nerdcore?

Will Ferrell in Wedding Crashers w/ Crust logo on forehead

Crust's packing tape expresses their sense of humor

So, who am I to judge? You want the bike or not? Okay, yes. I want it. By the time it became available, I wanted it a lot. Maybe the result of perceived scarcity following the long wait associated with the pandemic supply chain issues of the past two years. Maybe the pre-sale note saying, "things are looking a bit dicey for Crust". Maybe just N+1 syndrome. Maybe the return to a horizontal top tube, combined with the sparkly black "Galaxy" paint job that got me. Probably all of the above. But in the end, it is the prospect of the bike itself that forced my hand. 

Cycles Toussaint Vélo Routier, Version 2

You may recall that in Spring of 2018 I bought a Cycles Toussaint Vélo Routier. Like the Lightning Bolt, it is a Taiwanese, low-trail, 605b bike. It is, by its makers' own admission, an "entry level" bike, though I think that is so only in the sense that the components that came in the DIY build kit were entry level. The frame and fork have a couple of unique and glorious design elements that set the bike above and beyond every other production bike in it's category, the most striking of which is that it was spec'd for direct-mount, long reach, center-pull brakes. Unheard of. Even the tubing chosen for the Vélo Routier was as light as made sense for a production bike, using "oversize" (1 1/8") 4130 Cro-moly steel in .8/.5/.8. Honestly this a bike that could only have been built by a fanatic who didn't need the money. 

But Taiwanese builders are used to building mass production bikes to safety standards that assure they won't get sued, so that "light" steel, roughly equivalent to Reynolds 531, is still stiffer than the .7.4.7 Jan recommends for bikes that "plane". You want that kind of steel in a production frame, you gotta sign a waiver. Legend is, Matt Whitehead is just crazy enough to sign such a waiver, and spec a fork that is much more slender than the one on the VR. Word is the Lightning Bolt is basically the same spec as Jan Heine's Mule. Whatever the case, the Lightning Bolt frame and fork weigh about 180 grams less, over half of which (93 grams) is in the fork. 

The other, perhaps more significant difference between the Vélo Routier and the Lightning Bolt is in the geometry. Though Bike Insights shows a calculated trail for the VR at a ridiculously low 18.8mm, Cycles Toussaint themselves claim 30mm. I'll give them the benefit of the doubt. But even the 30mm is very low by conventional standards. The Lightning Bolt comes in at 40.2mm (for the 42mm tires I plan to ride). The Lightning Bolt's wheelbase is a bit shorter, as is its chainstay. The bottom bracket is also a bit higher on the Crust. In theory, all of these very minor differences should yield a bike that is quite similar to my old one, but with possibly a little less "twitchy" feeling due to the higher trail. But other elements can have an effect too, like handlebar width, crank and stem length. I haven't gotten the build worked out yet - the frame was a bit of an impulse buy, so I haven't thought through the components yet. Any way you cut it, I expect the differences to be subtle. Time will tell.

Crust sticker included in the box in which the bike shipped!

Lastly, there are a couple of elements floating around in my brain. First, there is still no brake attachment on the chainstay bridge. Not a deal-breaker by any means, and it probably saves weight - but they are elegant for any center-pull brake set-up, and the original prototype had them, so I can't help but be a bit disappointed. BUT, and I shouldn't be so excited about this, the Lightning Bolt has vertical rear dropouts. Now this is just about the most persnickety little thing, but the Vélo Routier has horizontal dropouts. Not a huge deal, but it caused me a lot of trouble early on, requiring me to purchase internal cam quick-release skewers, and it makes changing a rear tire difficult when the bike has fenders.Again, not the worst thing in the world, but I'm genuinely happy to see the more typical dropouts on the Crust.

Okay, enough for now. I'll post more as I start to think about the build. It's my intention to use a few parts from the ol' Parts Bin, mixed with some new "dream bike" parts that I'll have to save up for. Stay tuned.

...like you’re the star of the Brevet, leading everyone into a marshmallow and ice cream victory meal.

Oops, I did it again...

2022 Crust Cantilever Lightning Bolt

I couldn't help myself. After Jan Heine's glowing 2020 review of the pre-production model in Bicycle Quarterly (BQ70), I really wanted one. Then there was the über cool Ultra Romance coverage, e.g., The Radavist and CXMagazine. I was sold. Sure, I was put off by the skate punk typography and profane mermaid/centaur head badge (but hey, to Crust's credit, it's a real head badge!). I could live with the silly text if I could get a Heine-worthy frame/fork for less than the latest Campagnolo Chorus Groupset. And even kind of liked the green "crackle" paint. But then the production model came out. 

It was brown. It had a sloped top tube. There was no seat stay cable hanger. Blech! It had gone from aesthetically marginal to downright ugly. Was I willing to buy an ugly bike in the hope its ride quality was so ethereal it made me forget how it looks? Ugh. I dithered until Crust sold out of the "canti-bolt" and the decision made itself.  

No big deal. I really like my Cycles Toussaint, don't need another steed and don't really know what I'm missing anyway. So I let it go without too much regret, went about my life, watched the entire fucking world descend into chaos and death, and hoped Crust would come out with another bike I like. 

And they did. In February I got an "Only Fans" email saying they had some sample frames with a prototype "fancy" fork crown for sale, and hinting that a new model Cantilever Lightning Bolt ('22) would probably arrive in March. And the photos of the bike? Black paint and horizontal top tube!

I jumped for the "special" fancy, but there were only an extremely limited set of "samples" and they were gone by the time I clicked the link. Then on On March 3, 2022 came another email saying the following:

Well...we're doing it, we are breaking our rule of no pre-orders, no holds. We are usually hard and fast on this rule, because we are so small and keeping track of all the pre-orders can become fairly difficult on top of the day-to-day wildness of running a small business. Alas, things are looking a bit dicey for Crust, and we are fairly certain the Lightning Bolt's are due within the month (March), so we are opening them up for sale out of necessity. We will hold back on just a handful of each size, but we are pre-selling 99% of what's to come.

Again I jumped. I did a quick look at Bike Insights in the hope that I could verify the size, and sweeeeeeet!, they had the updated numbers! With 42mm tires, the stand-over height of the XS is within a millimeter of my current bike. So I pulled the trigger instantly. The order was placed on the 3rd, and the bike was delivered March 22. So let the adventure begin anew. To the parts bin!

Lightning Bolt Mermaid/Centaur Head Badge